NEPHART.COM

Do you need a break? From what?

Stop. Stop.

Someone screaming brake

like I am not already shaking,

like I am not already late.

I was driving faster, yes,

but still within the lines,

freeway mind,

speed-limit life,

you cannot just stop like that,

you curve,

you lean into hard corners

and hope you survive.

I needed a break.

My shoulder knows it.

Sleep does not arrive

unless a pill opens the door

and pretends it is rest.

Lists keep growing.

Days keep going.

Everything needs attention,

everything needs fixing,

everything needs me.

If I say I need a break from work,

then tell me

how money falls from the sky.

Because even when it rains,

I stay dry.

Thirsty.

If I say I need a break,

even my family

checks my words for excuses.

My brain runs on full gear.

Thoughts chasing thoughts,

metal on metal,

supersonic train,

no station,

no delay,

no end.

I want a break from screens,

from glowing squares and rectangles

teaching my eyes

how to forget the horizon.

All I want

is sunlight that does not judge,

air that smells like trees,

something real enough

to erase the perfume

I wear for people

I do not feel.

My ears need a break

from gossip,

from future fears spoken like facts,

from opinions loud enough

to drown listening.

I keep my distance from stereotypes,

but they keep finding me.

I hear them.

I nod.

I smile.

Arguing costs too much energy.

They shout

to prove they are right.

I stay quiet

to prove I am still breathing.

Maybe I should stop nodding.

My neck is tired.

My feet want roads, not floors.

My eyes want to drink

the silence of a lake.

Someone put me on a big stage.

No script.

No rehearsal.

One life.

One take.

Everything happens at once.

So if you ask me

do you need a break?

Maybe not from work.

Maybe not from people.

Maybe

from the noise.

From the speed.

From explaining.

Maybe

I just

need

a break.