Do you need a break? From what?
Stop. Stop.
Someone screaming brake
like I am not already shaking,
like I am not already late.
I was driving faster, yes,
but still within the lines,
freeway mind,
speed-limit life,
you cannot just stop like that,
you curve,
you lean into hard corners
and hope you survive.
I needed a break.
My shoulder knows it.
Sleep does not arrive
unless a pill opens the door
and pretends it is rest.
Lists keep growing.
Days keep going.
Everything needs attention,
everything needs fixing,
everything needs me.
If I say I need a break from work,
then tell me
how money falls from the sky.
Because even when it rains,
I stay dry.
Thirsty.
If I say I need a break,
even my family
checks my words for excuses.
My brain runs on full gear.
Thoughts chasing thoughts,
metal on metal,
supersonic train,
no station,
no delay,
no end.
I want a break from screens,
from glowing squares and rectangles
teaching my eyes
how to forget the horizon.
All I want
is sunlight that does not judge,
air that smells like trees,
something real enough
to erase the perfume
I wear for people
I do not feel.
My ears need a break
from gossip,
from future fears spoken like facts,
from opinions loud enough
to drown listening.
I keep my distance from stereotypes,
but they keep finding me.
I hear them.
I nod.
I smile.
Arguing costs too much energy.
They shout
to prove they are right.
I stay quiet
to prove I am still breathing.
Maybe I should stop nodding.
My neck is tired.
My feet want roads, not floors.
My eyes want to drink
the silence of a lake.
Someone put me on a big stage.
No script.
No rehearsal.
One life.
One take.
Everything happens at once.
So if you ask me
do you need a break?
Maybe not from work.
Maybe not from people.
Maybe
from the noise.
From the speed.
From explaining.
Maybe
I just
need
a break.